Thesis Defense and All its Blues.

It's like having your last judgement.

Everything you learned from four years of trying to figure things out will be criticized, humiliated, and shuttered, or maybe complimented if you're lucky enough. You can't undo anything, or wish you paid attention more to that particular lesson, or hope that you exerted so much enthusiasm to that puzzling theory. You just can't. The time has gone with the wind and with your luxurious leisure moments. You have to be resourceful from this time on. You can befriend the library, use the Internet to your advantage and rummage the deepest part of your brain with any useful stuff. You may also add relying with your buddies for any kind of help.

Now it all boils down to you and your beloved thesis mates. Your reason and creativity must be insanely in good shape to finish your paper and your hopefully jaw-dropping film. Every word of your paper must mean something significant. You don't have an opportunity to mess up your subject-verb agreement and pretend it was a typographical error. Pity yourself if you're like me who sometimes have a hard time articulating your thoughts in the best possible way. And don't be self-absorbed because you'll be needing a lot of related topics from different sources. Your sources must have the reliability of a highly anticipated evidence in court and it must not show any shadow of doubt. And for humanity's sake, plagiarism must not be in your vocabulary, you blithering idiot! You have all the necessary information for your paper written in a standard research/thesis structure, now how in the earth will you be able to transform this into a beautiful critical essay? To start with, the words "critical" and "essay" scare you out. You feel like entering a whole different galaxy or maybe traveling to the future with your time machine. It is a different world. A world so unknown you don't know where to begin with or how.

And yes, you're already estranged to that world when you scribble a blog post in the middle of writing the critical essay. You're going to realize that it's not that bad. It's even a good experience trying to do new things, trying to outrun yourself, trying to outgrow your intellectual fear. Distracted with what you just realized, you will simply toss this blog post aside. It's either you're too lazy to finish this off or you're too diligent that you'd rather get the critical essay done.

Greatest Dream. The Ubreakable Vow.

Humans as we are, I am aware of our limitations and how our time frame constraints us. We are not invincible. We can't do everything, but we can do something.

Before I leave this world, I want to do a small mission. That is to send three complete strangers to college, let them choose a degree and support them in all means until they graduate. I think it's quite difficult and expensive, but who cares? By this time, I am already a rich lady. I don't want to live in a fancy house and have luxurious cars. I want my life to be simple. Thus, I will allot my wealth to three complete strangers. I want to give them the chance to experience the beauty of college life. I want them to love education. I want them to help other strangers when their success finally unfolds. I want them to share the happiness of life to other people who are in need. I want to teach them how living in this Earth can be more fun and more humane. When this happens, I am ready to die.

Found my STARDUST!

Before I start mooning over my "first love", I would like to thank my beloved high school friends for all the love and food! Hehehe!
Belated Happy birthday, Chinggay! We wish you unlimited happiness and success! ^________^
just us...looking all beautifully grown up...
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Now...

Tell me, how can you explain the feeling of bumping into your "first love"? Tingling sensation? Wild, cute smile? Hundreds of somersaulting butterflies? Thousands of stars glistening amidst the cold night?

Yeah. Yeah. I know. How can I forget the feeling of falling in love with him the first time? I just can't...

Right. We're friends. We've been good friends ever since I started writing him friendly letters. It was a friendship I always keep. It is a kind of friendship I will always cherish.

Geez. He's one of the few people who brings out the best in me. Seeing him brought me in a total bliss, this will last for a week (enough to make a good quality paper).

I'm quite sure that I am no longer in love with him. But even after all these years, every time I get to see him I can't help but be captivated again and again. I don't know. He's really nice to me. He's nice to people. He loves his family dearly. He works hard for himself. He's a fun loving and clever person.

How can one not get attracted over and over and over again? Weeeee!

oh yes! i had a great time!

LUNA.

happy? hell yeah!

Weee!

I got it! Weee!

Too good to be true! :D

Finally, after all the wishful thinking, I now have my own DSLR. She's a Canon EOS 60D. An expensive, sassy chick that will brighten all the evenings of my life. She's LUNA.

Thanks to my beloved aunties, Mommy Dal and Mommy Ne. Thank you for your love and this wonderful gift! You're awesome!

^________^

I won't give up ni Jason Mraz.

Weee!

Hanep na kanta 'yan ni Jason Mraz. Paulit-ulit na pinatugtog ng kapatid ko kaya heto't parang gusto ko ulit ma-in love. Bongga di ba? Sasabihan ka ng, "I won't give up on us, even if the skies get rough..." Takte! Okay na okay na ko dyan.

Weee!

Bakante pows ang puso ko. Ayokong maghintay sa wala, kaya pahinga muna, anak.

Bakante pows para sa buong 2012. ^_______^

Advice.

In order to survive this graduating blues and tortures, I regularly let myself read, hear, or watch things that are highly encouraging to me. These things always make sense. They never fail to ignite the fire within me. Yes, this does not include any divine/supreme being/holiness related stuff. Everything is pure experience, fact-based. If other people make good things for the betterment of themselves, there's no reason for me not to excel.

As for me, it may seem odd but I find inspiration in reading scientific things. I get too excited. The humility one can learn from science is priceless. The arguments among scientists that always boil down by subjecting them in scrutiny to arrive at certain theories and laws bewilder me. Their capability to balance skepticism and open-mindedness also makes me realize of somethings in life.

YES! I'm a person of science.

Anyway, just a piece of unsolicited advice:

During tough times, look for an empirical inspiration, put it to test and be open to its possibilities.

Carl Sagan.

from Contact

"You see, the religious people—most of them—really think this planet is an experiment. That’s what their beliefs come down to. Some god or other is always fixing and poking, messing around with tradesmen’s wives, giving tablets on mountains, commanding you to mutilate your children, telling people what words they can say and what words they can’t say, making people feel guilty about enjoying themselves, and like that. Why can’t the gods leave well enough alone? All this intervention speaks of incompetence. If God didn’t want Lot’s wife to look back, why didn’t he make her obedient, so she’d do what her husband told her? Or if he hadn’t made Lot such a shithead, maybe she would’ve listened to him more. If God is omnipotent and omniscient, why didn’t he start the universe out in the first place so it would come out the way he wants? Why’s he constantly repairing and complaining? No, there’s one thing the Bible makes clear: The biblical God is a sloppy manufacturer. He’s not good at design, he’s not good at execution. He’d be out of business if there was any competition."

"The major religions on the Earth contradict each other left and right. You can’t all be correct. And what if all of you are wrong? It’s a possibility, you know. You must care about the truth, right? Well, the way to winnow through all the differing contentions is to be skeptical. I’m not any more skeptical about your religious beliefs than I am about every new scientific idea I hear about. But in my line of work, they’re called hypotheses, not inspiration and not revelation."

The Nicest Gifts.

PARA KINA:

Aira, Ching, Jols, Karen, Kevs, Khris, Koren, Lhet, Naxcz, Nikko and Reuben

PARA SA:

tawanan, iyakan, asaran, kwentuhan, kainan, inuman
at sa marami pang iba...

Friends make a dull person bubbly. They tame the wildest individuals. They keep people from committing unsuccessful suicides. They make the world a more interesting place to live in.

They sharpen your intellect; challenge your temper. Their love, care and companionship knows no boundaries. A bucket of beer, a bag of chips, a platter of their favorite dish, even their most loved gadget will be shared to you without hesitations.

You may not see them everyday. You may not talk to them for weeks or months. You may not know the profile of their latest love interest, because you may not even like that person either. You may not even understand some of their choices. You may disagree with what they think, say and do. You may even look dumb because you know not all of them knows your blog. You may even keep secrets from them. You may have a love-and-tampo relationship with them.

But these don't matter because...

You care for them like your flesh and blood brothers and sisters. You become the funniest side of yourself with them. You can whine all night without actually whining with them. You prepare food just for them to eat. You like hearing their crazy antics and random stories. You comfort them from every heart ache they get. You laugh at their stupidities; they also laugh at yours. You tease and call each other names as if you are 3rd graders. You can send them SMS and email not worrying that you're already annoying them. You can also not send them SMS and email every time without worrying that they won't love you anymore. You always have a great time whenever they are around.

Your friends are the meanest and kindest of the persons you know. They shape your personality. They teach you life's most interesting lessons. They annoy you like no other but love you more than any hot chick or cool guy in the world. They eat all of your food; you eat all their food. You listen to their problems and you can always share yours. They are your self's best mirrors. They are the nicest gifts.

Less is more. The focus is obvious.

HAPPY 2012 to the blogging community!

I feel so alive!

My mind has turned on this amazing panic button since the clock struck twelve. We have nineteen days to finish our dream thesis. We have nineteen busy days to have fun. This is actually good especially when you consider that after the nineteenth day sixty percent of my graduation is coming to life. Whew! We will absolutely come out alive and kicking!

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Dear Unsuccessful Love Life,

I would like to say thank you for making my heart skips every now and then. Thank you for introducing me to different kinds of guys who at the end never fail to prove that there is someone tailor-fitted for me. I'm sorry if I always fall in love easily. I'm sorry for exhausting my heart and brain.

Can we have a deal? I know this sounds utterly insane. But can you help me not to fall in love this year? I want to do greater things than finding and entertaining possible love interest. Please, just this year. Can you keep my heart away from me?

If I succeeded from this sort of pact, I would surely be happy. Big thanks!


PS: I'm a little hesitant but...oh..well.. I would like to believe that nobody's out there for me..yeah. :|