note

haha..di pulido paka-gawa.hahaha

magkita na lang tayo sa outer space..baka sakaling dun, ako lang. hay. :[

Thoughts on Him

I can't tell you how much I miss you. There's no point in telling you that.
Arg. I miss us. Of course I want us. Haha.
What can I do? You're still into her. Soooo into her.
Maybe you're just bidding your time to have her again. Maybe after a month or two, it will be you and her again. I must not care anymore.
It is your decision. I can't do anything.
I don't want to beg you to stay with me when your heart is still shouting her name.
That will be a pure insult to me.
I am left with no other choice now but to accept that we're not meant for each other.
We did not even try to work things involving the two of us.
You don't want to, because it's only her that you desire.
You're hurt every time she avoids you. I'm hurt every time you tell me that you spend sometime together.

It would all be easy if I believe what you said. Yeah, you're a jerk! You're an asshole! You're rude! You're evil! ----BUT YOU MAKE ME HAPPY.

sana ako na lang siya, para kahit anong sakit ibigay ko sa'yo...babalik ka pa rin. :'[

*sigh*

HIM

He calls me hot fudge sundae. He's my four-leaf clover.
He loves shoes. I love Cloud.
He likes Incubus and admires Brandon Boyd.
He was an orator during his high school days. I just met his former teacher yesterday.
He fears deep waters just like me.
He does not hear masses.
He looks sooo cute when he sweats. I noticed this when he played table tennis with me.
He loves traveling. We haven't had the chance to travel together. Sad.
He is a man of ART.
His art works are so amazing, honestly.
For some reason, he does not want his nape to be touched.


arg...pahirapan na naman 'to sa pag-move on.nakakapagod naman, oo! di ba kasi pwedeng. AKIN KA NA LANG? hahhaha. asa. grabe pang hang over kay ex eh..kainis.hay.hay.hay. sana hindi ko na lng naiintindihan. sana magalit na lang ako sa kanya. sana...sana..sana..crap. eh mahal ko yung tao.pano ako magagalit sa mga taong nagpapasaya sakin?

er...crap. I MISS YOU BIG TIME! T___T

letter to her

i envy you. you're lucky. you won't find another him. take care of him. take care of your love. don't dare to break his heart again. you won't like it when that happens, seriously. we both know that he loves you very much. love him the way he loves you.

i made him happy. you make him blissful. in his eyes, i'm nothing compared to you. i beg you don't break his heart. i love him more than both of you know.

take good care of yourself for him. thank you.

please...ingatan niyo na yang kung anong meron kayo. lawakan niyo pareho mga isip ninyo pag di kayo nagkakaintindihan. adjust to each other. hindi cool off at break ang solusyon tuwing mag-aaway kayo. mahal na mahal ka nun. mahal na mahal ko rin yun. eh mahal na mahal mo rin siya..kaya yan, exit na ko. hehehe..kaya niyo na yang dalawa.haha. basta. basta. hay, naiinis ako sayo pero yan naiintindihan ko kayo. keri lang.

sige po, salamat. huwag niyo na kong isipin, kaya ko 'to. ako pa! hehehe.. ^_____^



----minsan, praning lang. hay. inhale-exhale. pahirapan na naman 'to. the fun. ansakit na ng mata ko kakaiyak!crap.crap.crap.

WISH LIST

---Dahil magbibirthday na ko may konti akong wish..

(1) SKITTLES :)


(2) SINGLE RED ROSE :)

(3) YOU and ME ^___^

kaso, malabo 'tong huli. malabo. impsosible na.. :[

SIMPLE

Simple lang naman 'tong napasukan kong sitwasyon eh.

Ganito...

Nalulungkot siya kasi nagkaboyplend yung mahal nya. His ex for this matter. Ako naman mabuting kaibigan. Pinakinggan siya. Nakipagkwentuhan sa kanya. Pinayuhan siya. Nagshare rin ako ng problema ko ki 17, yun nakinig din naman siya.

Lagi na kaming nagkakasama. Kumakain ng sabay, nagmaMcdo, nanood ng sine, tumatawa at nagkwekwentuhan. Lagi lang kami nandyan para sa isa't isa. Masaya. Nawala yung pagkahumaling ko kay 17, pero siya patuloy pa rin yung sakit at pagmamahal niya kay ex. Wala na kong masabi. Bakit wala na akong masabi? Eh kasi mahal ko na pala siya. Ang gaga. Ambilis lang eh nahulog kagad ako. Lecheng yakap yan! Leche talaga. Doon nagsimula ang lahat. Nagpayakap naman ako. Eh ano naman kasi ang magagawa ko. IT FEELS SO RIGHT! MASAYA ako, bakit ba?

Eh kaso. As usual, ang kasiyahan ko ay laging sa umpisa lang. UMPISA. Hay, yan, nakipag-usap si ex. Well, sabi daw nya, eh friends. So, nothing to worry. Pero yan, nang mag-usap kami, well kahit hindi, na-sense kong it's not what he really wanted. Ahm, ganito. Tipong gusto nya makipag-ayos sa ex nya as in tipong balikan, PERO, hindi ayaw nya. Hindi raw kasi sigurado. Hindi sigurado. At yan, ayaw nya kong masaktan. So, nakokonsesya siya. Hay, eh ganon pa rin yun. Ayaw niyang i-let go. Ayaw niyang mag-move on. Ano naman kasi ang laban ko? Wala.


So yan, ang simple lang. Mahal ko na siya. Nagke-care lang siya sakin. Mahal niya pa si ex. Si ex mukhang mahal pa rin siya. Kelangan ko pa bang hadlangan? O sige, kayo na! KAYO NA ULIT.

Arg, on a second thought. I decided to stay, despite of it all. Hihihi. Matigas talaga ulo ko.

BAHALA NA. EWAN. BASTA. ^_____^

To my Four-leaf Clover

-random phrases, unorganized thoughts, profound emotions-

Thank you for still hanging on. It means so much to me.

Thank you for painting different hues to my October.

You never fail to make me happy every time we are together.

Thank you for your unending sweetness. I feel so lucky.

Every time you hold my hand, my heart skips. Thank you.

For your courage to make me understand things, thank you.

For all the sincere apologies, thank you. But you don't have to apologize.

I understand. I always do.

I'm sorry if I'm giving you moments of confusion.

I'm sorry if my presence annoys you.

I'm sorry if even my sweet words hurt you.

I'm sorry if I want to let go of you. Silly of me. We both know that I really don't want to.

I'm sorry if I hinder you to go back to her. I apologize.

I'm sorry if my love came too early. I can't help it. You're just too lovable.

For all the guilt you feel, I apologize.

We don't deserve these heartaches but we must pass through all of these.

If after all of these nuisances one of us must leave then so be it.

If we survive these battles together then let it be.

We don't need to rush things.

Let's savor the moment.

Let's set all our fears aside. Or if not then let's be scared together.

I'm with you, my four-leaf clover. ^_____^

Lecheng kahirapan

subukan niyo kayang gumawa ng chapter 4 na pagkahaba-haba habang nagbibigay ng sabaw tapos sukli, ngayon sumisigaw ang nanay ko ng yelo.lintik. naiinis ako.hndi naman kasi dapat ganito.hndi ako maka-concentrate sa paggawa.hindi makapag-aral ng maayos. eh bawal naman magreklamo, ano nga naman ang kakainin namin kung hindi rin ako kikilos.the eff na buhay. punyeta talaga. o cge. ayos. kasi may deadline akong hinahabol. mag-aaral pa para sa exam mamaya. at tamang tama para dagdagan lahat ng dapat kong isipin, nagtext pa ang gabay..hay, utang na loob, please naman po..hndi naman sa engrata ako, pero ayoko mg miss gabay...please...hay..ayoko na..i wanna die, as in now na. leche. leche, kung mayaman lang kami. lecheng kahirapan. lecheng kahirapan!!!! grrrr..

MASAYA.

Not in love. Not YET.

PARA KAY FOUR-LEAF CLOVER...

Happy to be with you. Indeed.
You're the reason of my wide grin. Thanks.
A friendship. A magical friendship.
Thanks for understanding. Thanks for being there.


Thank you for the hugs.
Everything seems to make sense now. :)

REKLAMO.

Who would honestly want someone who doesn't want to accept the "existence" of God?
Who would honestly want someone who doesn't go to church and hear mass?
Who would honestly want someone who doesn't know how not to speak her mind?
Who would honestly want someone who doesn't stand in the middle ground?

Who would honestly want someone who's stubborn and stupid?
Who would honestly want someone who's assertive and domineering?
Who would honestly want someone who's a norm breaker and radical thinker?
Who would honestly want someone who's not offering her life to God's glory?

Who would accept someone like me?
Who would not force or encourage me to go to church and hear the mass?
Who would understand the way I think and act?
Who would know how it feels to be deviant?


Who would?

Who would love me unconditionally?


DOWN. :))